ENTP and ESFP: Compatibility, Love, Marriage, and Romance
The practical, straight-talking ENTP and the sensitive, feeling ESFP may seem an unlikely pair, but these types have quite a bit to offer one another. Under the right circumstances, ENTPs and ESFPs can form mutually beneficial and satisfying relationships.
I. COMPATIBILITY
ENTPs and ESFPs aren’t considered highly compatible Myers-Briggs personality types, but they are far from incompatible. In fact, ENTP/ESFP relationships have a good chance at success, as partners in this personality pairing tend to go to great lengths to try and understand and accommodate their partners.
SUMMARY CHART: ENTP AND ESFP COMPATIBILITY VS. POSSIBLE CONFLICTS
| COMPATIBILITY | POSSIBLE CONFLICTS |
| ENTPs and ESFPs both enjoy socializing | ENTPs and ESFPs have different communication styles |
| Both types prefer leaving room in their schedules for creativity | Progressive versus traditional values |
| These types share a an unstructured approach to life | These types share a high tolerance for disorder |
| ENTPs and ESFPs are both enthusiastic communicators | ENTPs and ESFPs tend to approach relationships differently |
THREE REASONS WHY ENTPs AND ESFPs ARE GOOD FOR EACH OTHER
ENTPs and ESFPs can be good for each other for many reasons, three of which are:
- ENTPs and ESFPs both use socializing as a means of recharging
- These types share an energetic, can-do approach to life
- ENTPs and ESFPs can cover each other’s blind spots when making plans
ENTPs and ESFPs are extroverts; they both crave social activity and use time socializing to rejuvenate. An overbooked social calendar isn’t likely to be a cause for concern between ENTP and ESFP partners. These types also share an energetic approach to life.
ENTPs and ESFPs are well-positioned to cover one another’s blind spots when making plans. ESFPs generally attend to the smaller details when making plans; ENTPs focus more on the overall strategy, sometimes neglecting the details.
THREE REASONS WHY ENTPs AND ESFPs ARE NOT GOOD FOR EACH OTHER
ENTPs and ESFPs aren’t always suitable for one another. Three reasons ENTPs and ESFPs may not be good for each other are:
- ENTPs and ESFPs have different communication styles
- These types share a high tolerance for disorder
- ENTPs value change; ESFPs are traditionalists
The different communication styles of ENTPs and ESFPs are a potential source of conflict for the ENTP/ESFP couple. ENTPs think and communicate the abstract; they’re more interested in the “why” of a question than the “what.” ESFPs, on the other hand, are straight-talkers who prefer discussing things to ideas.
ENTPs and ESFPs share a high tolerance for disorder; this can prove problematic, as neither partner in an ENTP/ESFP couple is likely to feel motivated to clean. In such cases, the partner with a slightly lower tolerance for disorder finds themselves doing most of the housework, which leads to resentment.
Perhaps above all, ENTPs value change; they’re always looking for ways to improve existing systems. ESFPs, on the other hand, tend to be traditionalists and are likely to look askance at some of their counterpart’s progressive ideas.
COMMUNICATION
ENTPs and ESFPs are both enthusiastic communicators; there aren’t likely to be many conversational lulls between ENTP and ESFP partners. That said, there are some conversational pitfalls these types will need to avoid to enjoy mostly harmonious communication.
WHERE ARE THEY STRONG, AND WHY?
These types are both energetic communicators who enjoy lively conversation. In an ENTP/ESFP relationship, the ENTP can help their partner see past what’s obvious, while the ESFP can help the ENTP to focus on essential details.
WHERE DO THEY HAVE PROBLEMS, AND WHY?
A few areas may cause ENTP and ESFP partners problems regarding communication. For example, the ENTP’s conversational style may come across as blunt or overly assertive to their ESFP counterpart.
ENTPs and ESFPs have different communicative styles, which can be another potential source of conflict. ENTPs communicate abstractly, whereas ESFPs tend to prefer discussing things to ideas.
Though it can be a good thing, the fact that both partners in an ENTP/ESFP relationship are energetic communicators can create problems. One or the other partner is likely to feel they aren’t getting equal time to speak.
HOW MIGHT THEY IMPROVE COMMUNICATION?
One of the best ways an ENTP/ESFP couple can improve the quality of their communication is by learning to listen. It can be downright uncomfortable for an expressive extrovert with something to say to remain quiet; in some circumstances, staying silent and listening attentively is the best way to say I love you.
WHERE DO THEY CONNECT? WHY?
When first meeting an ESFP, an ENTP is likely to be intrigued. On the one hand, the ESFP may not seem particularly inclined to deep thought, something the ENTP values highly; on the other hand, the ENTP is bound to be drawn to the ESFP to some degree because of the fun they seem to be having.
ENTP AND ESFP: VALUES
ENTPs and ESFPs have little overlap in what they value, but that isn’t to say they have none. Both types value genuineness and socializing, for example. In general, though, the ENTP/ESFP couple will have to work through some significant value differences.
THREE THINGS AN ENTP VALUES
- Innovation/Positive change
- Knowledge/Learning new things
- Adventure
As touched on above, ENTPs place a high value on positive change. Unlike their ESFP counterparts, they believe most everything can be improved through careful analysis and innovation.
Learning new things is also something ENTPs value. Often lifelong learners, ENTPs tend to be avid readers and may even take classes on subjects that interest them.
ENTPs crave adventure; they have a low tolerance for the mundane and seek out ways to shake things up for themselves and their friends.
THREE THINGS AN ESFP VALUES
- Tradition
- Action
- Socializing
Rather than seeing change as a positive in itself, ESFPs are reticent to tinker with what seems to work. They tend to trust in the institutions that have served humanity thus far and resist sweeping or overreaching change.
As sensing perceiver types, ESFPs value action. They want to engage in activities that fill their senses and push their limits. Socializing is also a very high priority for the ESFP, meaning few of their adventures are likely to be solo experiences.
HOW DO THEIR VALUES MATCH UP?
Though there is some minor overlap, the values of ENTPs and ESFPs are generally quite different. ENTP and ESFP romantic partners in a healthy relationship will find themselves doing a lot of “agreeing to disagree.”
LOVE LANGUAGE/LOVE STYLE
Their many personality differences notwithstanding, ENTPs and ESFPs communicate love for their partners in many of the same ways. In fact, the top three love languages of ENTPs are the same as those of the ESFP but in a different order.
WAYS ENTPs SHOW THEIR LOVE
- Spending quality time with their partners
- Physical touch
- Speaking words of affirmation
The most common way ENTPs express love is by spending quality one-on-one time with their partners. This is a significant show of affection, as ENTPs are typically more comfortable in groups of people.
Physical touch is the second most common way ENTPs show their love, followed by speaking words of affirmation.
WAYS ESFPs SHOW THEIR LOVE
- Physical touch
- Spending quality time with their loved ones
- Speaking words of affirmation
Like their ENTP counterparts, ESFPs use physical touch to express love for their romantic partners. Spending quality time alone with their partner, a significant show of love for any extrovert is the ESFP’s second favorite love language.
The ESFP’s third most common love language is speaking words of affirmation, an apt show of love from a verbally expressive personality type.
ENTPs AND ESFPs IN BED
ENTPs have intense sexual energy; in bed, they are generally adventurous and look for ways to keep intimate relations from becoming routine or boring. ESFPs also have strong sexual energy and are less likely to become distracted at the wrong time than their thinking partners. For ESFPs, a good part of intimacy is ensuring their partners enjoy the moment.
II. ENTP AND ESFP COUPLES/MARRIAGE
HOW DO ENTPs AND ESFPs MATCH UP IN LONG-TERM ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIPS?
ENTP MALE/ESFP FEMALE
ENTP/ESFP relationships have a reasonable chance at happiness, though some areas may cause the ENTP male/ESFP female pairing some difficulty. For example, the feeling ESFP female may find the straightforward communication style of her ENTP partner to be blunt or even disagreeable. The ENTP male, on the other hand, may find his feeling partner to be overly emotional.
ENTP FEMALE/ESFP MALE
Like the ENTP male/ESFP female couple, the ENTP female/ESFP male pairing also has a reasonable chance for long-term success. There is a danger, however, that the ENTP may find her feeling counterpart impractical or needlessly emotional. Conversely, there’s the chance the ESFP male may find his partner cold or lacking in feeling.
III. ENTP AND ESFP CONFLICTS
Conflict is inherent in all human relationships; how partners in a relationship address potential conflict is a good indicator of their chances for success. Like all couples, ENTP/ESFP romantic partners will have to deal with at least their fair share of disagreement and misunderstanding.
POSSIBLE AREAS OF CONFLICT (AND WHY)
When ENTP and ESFP partners experience conflict, it’s often for one of the following reasons:
- ENTPs and ESFPs have different communication styles
- These types have potentially opposing values
- ENTPs and ESFPs share a high tolerance for disorder
The sometimes tactless, even blunt communicative style of the ENTP may not be the best match for the feeling ESFP, a sensing type who’s constantly monitoring the emotional tone of discussions.
ENTPs and ESFPs will often find themselves on opposing sides of ideological arguments. The traditional values of the ESFP and the more progressive values of the ENTP aren’t easily reconciliable, and the ENTP/ESFP couple will have to do a fair bit of compromising to make things work.
A shared tolerance for disorder can prove troublesome for ENTP/ESFP partners, as the partner with a lower tolerance will probably wind up doing all the housework. The disorder can also cause problems with scheduling and making plans.
HOW DO THEY RESOLVE CONFLICT?
ENTPs and ESFPs approach conflict resolution very differently. ENTPs don’t shrink from conflict and, in fact, sometimes seek it out. They are good at getting their point across and enjoy debating, seeing argument as an opportunity to be both a teacher and a student.
ESFPs, on the other hand, are sensitive by nature and will go to some lengths to avoid or postpone dealing with conflict. Unlike their ENTP partners, ESFPs prefer to avoid an argument when possible.
HOW DO THEY BUILD TRUST?
Though not as reticent to trust as some other Myers-Briggs personality types, ENTPs are nonetheless careful about trusting others. ENTPs know that trust is often abused and are sensitive to the idea of being used for another’s gain. That said, ENTPs tend to be genuine and, depending on their environment and moral compass, usually make trustworthy friends.
ESFPs, though feeling types, tend to be practical concerning trust. When someone violates an ESFPs trust, the ESFP generally sees it as an isolated incident and not a commentary on the overall trustworthiness of humankind.
IV. ENTP AND ESFP FRIENDSHIPS
Despite their significant personality and value differences, ENTPs and ESFPs have the potential to form wonderful, even lifelong, friendships. In a healthy friendship, the ENTP and ESFP will make the most of their differences, recognizing them as chances for growth.
ENTP VS. ESFP: APPROACH TO FRIENDSHIP
When seeking friends or romantic partners, ENTPs look for people who stimulate them intellectually. A “yes-man” (or person) is of no value to the ENTP, who prefers to be challenged regarding their ideas and opinions. ENTPs tend to make loyal and fun friends, but they usually have blind spots regarding the feelings of others.
As sensing perceiver types, ESFPs live to enjoy the moment; they are about action and stimulating the senses, looking for little more in a friend than someone who’s up for some adventure.
ENTP AND ESFP FRIENDSHIP DYNAMICS
ENTPs and ESFPs love socializing, which can be the common ground on which these disparate personality types may connect. These types also exhibit many complementary traits, making them potentially stronger as a unit.
WHAT MAKES THEM GOOD FOR EACH OTHER AS FRIENDS?
ENTPs and ESFPs are often good for one another as friends. These types can challenge one another to broaden their perspectives and consider opinions they otherwise wouldn’t have. For example, the feeling ESFP will remind their thinking counterpart to consider the feelings of others, while the ENTP can help their feeling friend deal with tough, practical decisions.
COULD THEY BE CLOSE FRIENDS?
Though very different personality types, ENTPs and ESFPs have the potential to complement each other’s strengths and weaknesses. ENTPs and ESFPs can become close, even lifelong friends, when they choose to move beyond their differences.
WHAT ARE SOME AREAS THAT MIGHT CAUSE THEM PROBLEMS AS FRIENDS?
Several areas might potentially cause problems for ENTP/ESFP friends; many of them the same that challenge ENTP/ESFP romantic pairings. For example, potentially incompatible communication styles and values can cause friction for ENTP/ESFP friends.
