ENTP and ESTP: Compatibility, Love, Marriage, and Romance

The curious ENTP and the energetic ESTP might make a challenging pair. However, these two types have some key differences and similarities that can help aid in their relationship more long-lasting and effective. Freedom, spontaneity, and logic are what these two types are about, and they have a shared desire to take on new challenges and experiences that can keep them busy together for a long time.

I. Compatibility

Generally, ENTPs and ESTPs have the potential to make an interesting match. Their relationships tend to be as spontaneous as they are, and depending on how mature they are, ENTP and ESTP pairs can make each other feel like they’re either in heaven or hell, and sometimes they may feel like they’re in both places at the same time.

Usually, forming deep emotional connections prove difficult for ENTP and ESTP couples, but they do have the potential to develop close friendships with each other, and they may grow to see each other as effective team partners. For ENTP and ESTP couples, a certain distance tends to remain between them as both ENTPs and ESTPs are cerebral types who seek new experiences (that can sometimes be shallow) over fully settling down and committing to one person, situation, or idea.

For ENTP and ESTP pairs, the success of their relationship depends on how willing they both are to understand and adapt to each other. If just one of them is unwilling to go all-in, then this relationship can dissolve just as quickly as it formed.

 

Summary Chart: ENTP and ESTP Compatibility vs. Possible Conflicts 

Compatibility Possible Conflicts
Both types are good at adapting to new situations Both types are cerebral and can struggle to open up to each other
Both types are usually rational and level-headed Both types can be stubborn when they’re convinced they’re right
ENTPs and ESTPs can make an effective team when working together Both types can have chaotic lives due to a lack of structure

 

3 Reasons Why ENTP and ESTP Are Good for Each Other 

There are three reasons why ENTPs and ESTPs can be good for each other.

  1. They are both adaptable.
  2. They are both cerebral and down-to-earth.
  3. They are an effective team.

ENTPs and ESTPs both have the Perceiving trait. Because of this, both of these types are usually naturals at adapting to new situations or change, and in fact, they tend to welcome them.

ENTPs and ESTPs both thrive when facing challenges and are usually capable at solving problems and finding their ways around obstacles and messes.

For both ENTPs and ESTPs, mental stimulation is a need. They are both prone to growing bored quickly yet have low-boredom thresholds. For ENTPs, they love to get their intellectual stimulation from debates and conversations with others, which can make them appear quite argumentative and verbally aggressive.

ESTPs, too, can be argumentative and verbally aggressive, though they tend to be more mentally stimulated by solving problems and actively doing things rather than by just talking or debating with others. 

Being that they’re two of the most rational types, ENTPs and ESTPs are rarely put off by their mutual argumentativeness and are usually able to get over the conflicts that may arise quickly, as if their words are like water off a duck’s back.

ENTPs and ESTPs both are typically direct communciators who focus on facts and logic over emotion. Being that they are also both problem-solvers who can be quite resourceful and practical when necessary, these two types often make a great team. The ENTP brings their creativity and innovative thinking to the team, while the ESTP usually grounds the ENTP’s ideas and actually puts them to work.

And because ENTPs and ESTPs are both straightforward and usually have thick skin, when problems arise in the team, they are typically able to deal with the issue upfront and get it out of the way so that they can go back to doing the work the matters rather than wasting their time and energy talking through hurt feelings.

 

3 Reasons Why ENTP and ESTP Are Not Good for Each Other 

While there are reasons why ENTPs and ESTPs can be good for each other, there are also a few reasons why these two types can be bad for each other as well.

  1. Emotions can be a challenge for both of them.
  2. They can both be incredibly stubborn.
  3. They both lack structure and turn their heads at being told what to do.

Because ENTPs and ESTPs are both so rational and cerebral, emotions, both their own and others, can be a challenge for each of them. 

Both ENTPs and ESTPs are often stereotyped as being unemotional, but they’re still people not robots. Therefore, ENTPs and ESTPs do have softer sides and can be highly emotional, but they just prefer to prioritize logic and reason at the expense of thinking about, reflecting on, or sometimes even acknowledging (their or other’s) emotions.

Because feelings are a subjective matter, both ENTPs and ESTPs tend to classify them as unimportant or irrelevant, for the most part, until it comes back to bite them.

Since emotions don’t come easily to ENTPs and ESTPs, and since these two types tend to be more private despite being so social, ENTPs and ESTPs can be bad for each other in relationships because they may fail to grow close due to keeping each other at a distance.

Also, because they don’t prioritize feelings, understanding and working through them when emotional conflicts arise between the pair will possibly prove to be an insurmountable challenge and lead to the relationship ending when it could have been saved through open and honest communication about what’s really bothering them (their feelings), rather than them each focusing their attention on arguing about superficial intellectual matters or disagreements.

For ENTPs and ESTPs to process their feelings, they usually need time and to self-reflect, which these two active, low-boredom-threshold-having, externally-focused types usually refuse to do. 

On top of struggling to understand and take seriously their own and other’s emotions, ENTPs and ESTPs also tend to be incredibly stubborn, especially when they are convinced that they are right. Telling an ENTP they are wrong is the fastest way to find oneself stuck in a never-ending “debate” with an ENTP who is determined to tell you all the reasons and ways in which you are the one who is actually wrong, while crossing an ESTP when they are feeling particularly confident and stubborn is a quick way to find oneself being bullied.

Because ENTPs and ESTPs view the world through different lenses, it’s not uncommon for them to disagree, and these disagreements can lead to the worst-case scenario power struggle described above, particularly when the ENTP and the ESTP in the relationship are immature or unhealthy. 

ENTPs and ESTPs can have big egos, so it’s important for them to keep them in check in order for their relationship to work. 

While the Perceiving trait that ENTPs and ESTPs share can help make them good for each other since it aids in them both being more adaptable and flexible to new situations and change, this shared trait can also make these two types bad for each other.

ENTPs and ESTPs shared love for freedom, flexibility, and spontaneity can be a problem for their relationship because they may both struggle to stick to plans or keep track of important schedules or commitments. Housework and general everyday responsibilities may also be overlooked, and keeping track of money and their expenses may spell trouble. 

 

Communication 

ENTPs have Extroverted Intuition (Ne), Introverted Thinking (Ti), Extroverted Feeling (Fe), and Introverted Sensing (Si) as their four cognitive functions, while ESTPs have Extraverted Sensing (Se), Introverted Thinking (Ti), Extraverted Feeling (Fe), and Introverted Intuition (Ni). This means that ENTPs and ESTPs share two functions (Ti and Fe), and they have two functions that differ as well (Ne vs Ni and Si vs Se).

ENTPs are driven by their intuition thanks to their dominant Ne, while ESTPs are driven by their senses. In other words, ENTPs are forward-thinking innovators who like to dive into abstract ideas and hypotheticals, while ESTPs are go-getters who care less about the abstract and more about what’s “real” and can be experienced through their physical bodies and senses.

The stark differences between their dominant functions are one reason why communication between these two types can sometimes be a struggle, as ENTPs and ESTPs see and experience the world differently despite having some similarities.

 

Where are they strong and why? 

Where ENTPs and ESTPs are strong are in their shared ability to have logical discussions without embedding too much emotion into them and their shared desire to solve problems.

ENTPs and ESTPs often have a mutual fascination in how the other one thinks and processes information. Because they view the world in different lenses, these two types can find understanding each other’s ideas to be an interesting and entertaining experience.

Where ENTPs and ESTPs are also strong is in their shared direct way of communicating. Because both of these types are straightforward, when problems occur, they deal with them quickly rather than just letting them sit and stew. 

 

Where do they have problems and why? 

Where ENTPs and ESTPs have problems is in how differently they see the world. ENTPs are abstract thinkers, while ESTPs are realists. ENTPs value innovation, while ESTPs would rather not fix what they don’t see as broken. ENTPs focus on the future, while ESTPs are primarily just concerned about what’s happening right now. These differences in values and worldviews are often hard ENTPs and ESTPs to overcome and can cause troubles for their communication and relationship in general.

 

How might they improve communication? 

ENTPs and ESTPs can improve communication if the ENTP puts their hypotheticals to the side when talking with the ESTP and focuses on using tangible facts and ideas when talking with them. Additionally, the ESTP should focus less on the small details when talking to the ENTP and should forward to telling them the big picture or overall point of what they’re trying to say. The ESTP doesn’t care about the ENTP’s hypotheticals, and the ENTP couldn’t care less about all of the small details of the ESTP’s ideas or conclusions. The ESTP should get to the point. 

 

Where do they connect? Why? 

Where ENTPs and ESTPs connect is in the fact that they’re both Extroverted Thinking Perceivers. Because of these shared traits, both ENTPs and ESTPs are good are other people and thrive in social interactions. They both can be very charming, and they’re both more laid-back and rational.

Neither ENTPs nor ESTPs fuss much about making or sticking to plans and prefer to go with the flow. Both of them prioritize Freedom and new experiences, and they tend to put things off until the last minute. Both of these types also like working in spurts of energy and may abandon projects as quickly as they start them.

 

ENTP & ESTP: Values

ENTPs and ESTPs both feel strongly about their values.

 

3 Things an ENTP Values 

  1. Debate and new intellectual experiences
  2. Freedom and spontaneity
  3. Innovation 

 

3 Things an ESTP Values 

  1. New experiences
  2. Freedom and spontaneity
  3. Solving problems quickly

 

How do their values match up? 

ENTPs and ESTPs both value having new experiences. For ENTPs, they tend to value new intellectual experiences more, while ESTPs tend to value new physical or sensory experiences more. ENTPs and ESTPs both also value their freedom and enjoy being spontaneous. 

Where ENTPs’ and ESTPs’ values differ most is in what they prioritize when making decisions and forming ideas. ENTPs value creativity and innovation, while ESTPs value coming up with solutions and ideas quickly, and as a result, they tend to focus on what has worked in the past at the expense of innovation and new ideas. 

 

Love Language/Love Style

ENTPs and ESTPs both have Quality Time and Physical Touch as two of their top love languages. ESTPs also usually have Words of Affirmation as a top love language as well.

 

Ways ENTPs Show Their Love 

ENTPs show their love in the following ways:

  • They’re protective 
  • They’re communicative 
  • They’re spontaneous 
  • They’re adaptable 

 

Ways ESTPs Show Their Love 

ESTPs show their love in the following ways:

  • They’re enthusiastic 
  • They’re caring 
  • They’re attentive 
  • They’re protective 

 

ENTP and ESTP in Bed 

Both ENTPs and ESTPs are adventurous and passionate in bed. Sex between them may be intense and aggressive. Neither ENTPs or ESTPs are adverse to casual sexual relationships, though they may prefer sex when it is with someone they feel more connected to.

 

II. ENTP and ESTP Couples/Marriage 

How well-matched are they in a long-term romantic relationship? 

 

ENTP Male and ESTP Female

ENTP males and ESTP females may share a need for adventure and spontaneity. Initially, they may be drawn to each other because of how much fun they may have together as well as the fact that they both are likely very charming.

Once things get more serious, however, they may notice that they ignored some big differences between each other that they may have found cute at one point but may find annoying now. One such difference may be in how they think. At first, the ENTP male may like how simple and present-focused the ESTP female is, but with time, he may find himself growing bored of little she is willing to dive into abstract discussions with him, and he may also grow to find how simple she is to be a sign of her immaturity and naivety. As for the ESTP female, she may initially like how abstract the ENTP male’s thinking is and see it as a cute little “quirk” of his, but later, she may think his ideas are ridiculous and a waste of time while also growing tired of how much time he spends thinking rather than doing.

 

ESTP Male and ENTP Female 

ESTP male and ENTP female relationships may start of being very fun, but with time they may grow bored of each other and desire to experience new things without having the other person around. ESTP male and ENTP female couples may grow apart and come to dislike certain traits in each other that they once saw as positives.

The ESTP male may wish the ENTP female was more realistic and active, while the ENTP female may wish the ESTP male was more complex.

 

III. ENTP and ESTP Conflicts

Conflict is a part of all relationships, and this is especially true for the dynamic relationships between ENTP and ESTP pairs.

 

Possible Areas of Conflict (and Why) 

  1. Conflict itself – Both ENTPs and ESTPs are direct and aren’t prone to facing away from conflicts. In fact, they may both see conflict as a way to sharpen their debating skills, in the case of the ENTP, and show off their prowess, in the case of the ESTP. As a result, conflicts may form between this pair that could have been avoided if not for their egos or overconfidence. 
  2. Their different worldviews – ENTPs and ESTPs see the world differently, and conflicts can arise as a result. Both ENTPs and ESTPs can be argumentative when their ideas are challenged, and this can lead to conflicts between the pair.
  3. Their mutual stubbornness – ENTP find it hard to accept being wrong, and ESTPs find it hard to accept ideas that go against their status quo. When these two types think they are right, conflicts can occur due to both of them being stubborn and not wanting to back down.

 

How do they resolve conflict? 

ENTPs and ESTPs can resolve conflict by putting their egos and self-interests aside and working together to solve whatever problem they have. 

These two types can work incredibly well together as a team to solve problems and achieve mutual goals, so if they make an effort to see each other as partners rather than competitors, then resolving their conflicts shouldn’t be difficult for this capable pair. 

 

How do they build trust?

ENTPs are likely to build trust with ESTPs who are more open-minded to their ideas and creative solutions, and ESTPs are likely to build trust with ENTPs who are more reliable when working on projects together and who value the contributions the ESTP bring to the table by helping to keep track of the small details so that they aren’t lost in the ENTP’s big picture.

 

IV. ENTP and ESTP Friendships 

ENTPs and ESTPs have enough similarities and differences between them to attract them to one another as friends and make their friendships fun and interesting. 

 

ENTP vs. ESTP: Approach to Friendship

Since ENTPs and ESTPs are both extroverted, talkative, and charming, they are likely to form at least a superficial relationship quickly, but it will take longer to become more deeply connected. 

 

ENTP & ESTP Friendship Dynamics 

The ENTP is likely to be the creative one between this pair, while the ESTP will likely be tasked to ground the ENTP’s ideas. The friendship between the ENTP and ESTP is likely to be based on having fun, being spontaneous, and having many debates and conversations.

 

What makes them good for each other as friends? 

What makes ENTPs and ESTPs good for each other as friends is that they are both likely to enjoy new, fun experiences when together but will also challenge each other as well. The ENTP will challenge the ESTP to be more creative in their thinking, while the ESTP will challenge the ENTP to actually put their ideas into action and not get too lost in hypotheticals. By challenging each other, these two types will push each other to grow and become more mature.

 

Could they be close friends? 

ENTPs and ESTPs can be close friends, but their friendship is likely to be more of a mental and social one than a deep emotional one. Because they likely won’t be very deeply connected, if these two types lose a common interest, or if one or both of them move, then they are likely to grow apart and no longer remain friends quickly.

 

What are some areas that might cause them problems as friends?

Some areas that might cause them problems as friends are their stubbornness, their different ways of seeing the world, and their shared love for freedom. If arguments arise, they can get out of hand because of their stubbornness and different worldviews, and because of their value their freedom and being spontaneous, they may both fail to keep up with their plans and commitments towards one another, which can cause conflict between them or cause them to grow apart naturally.